It's A Dog's Life

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Today was the best day ever!

It all started this morning when Lindy asked me if I wanted to go to work with her. After these many long days of sitting home waiting for her to come wandering back home, I was finally going to be part of "working." I've got to tell you, "work" is a lot of fun.

On the way to work Lindy and I went to the store for Smart Pets like me. Lindy said that it was a little bit out of our way but I didn't care because I was riding in the car. Oh, Joy! And Lindy put the top down just for me. I thought that was really sweet of her. When we were at the store for Smart Pets I saw some other dogs and Lindy bought me a couple of new balls, one red and one yellow. And she got me some Bil-Jak too.

Here's a picture of me riding in the car.
See how happy I am?

Then, this is the best part, on the way home, Lindy took me by to see my vet! I go to the Four Paws@Four Points because Lindy likes the way they treat me there.

The first person I met at Four Paws@Four Points was my vet assistant, Lori, she is there to assist me while I’m at the vet. She weighed me. Lori was real cool but Lindy was all like, “Come, Sit, Stay…” all bossy like that. It makes her feel like such a big mammal to boss me around. It’s annoying but I usually just go along to get along. Know what I mean?

This is a picture of me with my assistant Lori. Lori only assists me when I am at the vet. That’s why I call her my veterinary assistant.

According to Lori, I weigh 26.2 pounds which is just perfect for a good dog like me. It’s solid muscle too, I’ll tell you what. Even my vet said so!

So then some of my other assistants came and took me away because it probably would have scared Lindy too much if she’d seen what they did. They took some of my blood and some of my doo doo! They are going to send it away so scientists can study it. I always sensed that there was something very special about my doo doo because Lindy likes to pick it up and save it. But, I thought she was just being sentimental. Turns out my doo doo is really hot shit! My assistants were too discrete to say anything but I believe that the scientists want to see if they can figure out what makes me so special.

Then my vet came in. She is nice and gives treats. My vet’s name is Martha Kleypas, DVM. But, we are on a first name basis with one another. I call her Martha and she just calls me Rowan.

This is a picture of me hanging out with my vet, Martha. Martha is the greatest. Look at how much she loves me! Plus, she has lots of treats. I love Martha.

In a special report that Martha wrote all about me she said that I am “Handsome and Fit,” which is an understatement but I am glad that she noticed all the same.

Martha also noted that my coat, eyes, and ears were all “normal.” Of course anyone can see that my ears are gigantic! I really do believe that in many ways I exceed “normal.” But, Martha is just a human so whadda ya expect? She did note that I have a “great range of motion” I guess because I can jump and twist at the same time. That’s how I laugh. And, when she looked at my muscles, Martha said I was “ripped” which is a technical veterinary term that means fabulous. That part wasn’t in the written report though.

Here is a photo of me reviewing the special report by my vet. I think you have to be pretty special to get a whole report written all about you. Mine even has a picture of me right on the front page! -- That's my bowl in teh background. It holds a whole gallon!

When I left my assistants presented me with a little bandana. It had a hopelessly juvenile motif printed on it so Lindy said I could wear my gay pride bandana when we got home. It’s much more sophisticated, as even a human can see.

Here is a picture of me in my gay pride bandana. I think I look very gay in this shot. Lindy said that there are some things more important than looking gay but we were unable to think of any. of them

I had a great time at the vet. In fact, I wish I could go everyday. I don't think that's going to happen though. Lindy said that it cost a hundred damn dollars to go to the vet. I'm no economist but I think that's pretty close to a hundred regular dollars. What it means is that I'll probably have to wait a whole another year before I get to go back to the Four Paws@Four Points to see my beloved staff of assistants and my sweet Vet Martha. Absence will only make my heart grow fonder for them...