It's A Dog's Life

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Are YOU As Misanthropic as Grendel?

My guardian just took this quiz which proves for all time that she is exactly 76% misanthropic.

You Are 76% Misanthropic

Here's the truth: Most people suck. You are just lucky enough to know it.
You're not ready to go live alone in a cave - but you're getting there.


I just wonder... is that as misanthropic as Grendel?

Just so you know, that's not a real picture of my guardian up there. My guardian is MUCH prettier than that. Much. Blogs don't lie.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

I Got tagged By a Human!

Yea! I’ve been tagged!

Scout’s guardian, the very swell Diane, has tagged me to participate in a special thing called Ten Random Things About Me! So, here they are. And, just to be a rule follower, I’ve put them in random order.

I am an excellent climber of trees. A lot of dogs can’t climb trees at all and I feel very proud of the fact that I can.

My favorite treat is Bil-Jak. I will do ANYthing to get one.

I still jump up on the kitchen counter when Lindy is not around. Don’t tell, OK?

I like to make my guardian giggle.

Even though my guardian is an Anglican, I am a Methodist. They have better treats.

There are three girl dogs that I have a dog crush on, and I think they like me too.

I am scared to ride in the kayak. There’s something unnatural about being in the water and not getting wet. The dog gods don’t like it.

I put my pee in places that will give me and my guardian the most dominant position in the neighborhood. Lindy has very little sense of appreciation for my efforts but I know what’s best for us.

Buddy the cat scares me. So does the vacuum cleaner.

My best skill is napping.

OK. I tag Misty, Balboa, Romeo, Maggie and Poppy the little tiny dog.

You can read Romeo's answers HERE. They made my guradian laugh.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

My Interview With Maggie

As most of you know, I have asked to be interviewed by the very cool dog, Maggie.

Maggie has a human named Kate who helps out with the typing and I would imagine some other light administrative work… just regular support staff stuff. It is so very important for active dogs like me and Maggie to have good support staff. I don’t know how I ever managed back before I got adopted.

Maggie’s questions are in green -- same color as grass -- and my answers are in the regular black color.

1. I see that one of your main things is making Lindy laugh. What have you found are the best ways to do that? (I see it is not your recent efforts on the counters, tough luck, that sounded fun!)

Yeah… I was into that counter surfing, I’ll tell you what. Too bad that didn’t work out.

Lindy laughs quite a lot for a human. But, my favorite is called giggling and I can make her do that by licking behind her ear in a special place. Lindy like for me to wake her up this way. Oh, she acts like she doesn’t like it. But, it’s an act because she always winds up giggling in the end.

2. So how do you like being named after that bishop anyway? Do you share any theological or other important thoughts with him?

As you probably know, Maggie, Rowan Cantur has turned out to be kind of a disappointment.

It’s hard to say how our theology compares because Cantur’s keeps changing. But, basically:

  • I think Cantur is in favor of having some people be better than other people. I am not for that.
  • Cantur likes the idea of making people all agree to some things called a covenant and making that a kind of litmus test to see if you can be in his special club. I am not for that either.
  • When Cantur has a party at Lambeth Palace he only invites the bishops he likes. I would invite all the bishops. That’s just the kind of dog I am.
  • When mean bishops from Africa try to start legislation in their countries that would make it illegal even to have lunch with a gay person in public, Cantur supports that. I do not
  • Cantur remains silent in the face of injustice, famine, war and other bad human things. I do not and neither does my guardian.
  • Cantur lets only a few of his favorite people define what it means to be an Anglican for the rest of the Anglicans. Dogs don’t do that. We don’t try to define dogginess because that would necessitate some dogs not being dogs anymore. That kind of thing is not known in the animal kingdom. Even cats and pigs do not engage in such bad behavior.

Cantur has more fur than me. Just so you know.

I do, however, like the ABC’s books. So does Lindy. Lindy likes his books because he is able to draw so widely, and yet write in a way that is totally accessible and fun for her. I like them because they keep Lindy busy and free me up for napping and bird watching.

We both wish that Rowan Cantur would leave Canterbury and go back to some academic institution and use his real gifts of teaching and writing.

I think he would be happier if he had a good dog. A dog could lick him and make him laugh. It could save the communion, I'll tell you what.

3. I read about how you were a hero with the bat. Other than the Big Lock Up, has this changed your life in any way? Like do you think you are a Finer and More Wonderful Dog Than Ever? (I confess that I think I might if I saved revdrkate from a bat!)

Well, Maggie, I’ll tell you what, sometimes I wonder. I mean, I don’t get to go to work, climb trees, swim, sniff of my dog friends, chase cats, or have friends over. I am starting to think that I am a very bad dog indeed. Otherwise, why would I get kicked out of doing all my favorite things with all my good and swell friends?

I was so distressed that I started chewing on my tail. It helps with the feelings of rejection and of not being wanted. This morning Lindy noticed some sores on my tail and we sat down and had a talk. She told me that chewing on your tail is a normal reaction for stress. Only if you are a dog, of course. Don’t let your human do it! And she told me that this exile won’t go on forever. But, how long? Oh, how long?

I did feel a little bit better after talking to Lindy. And she gave me some good pets all over including my belly. I like the belly pets.

I hope that someday I feel like a Finer and More Wonderful Dog again. I used to feel that way all the time. There was a human named Mother Teresa who, despite not even having a dog herself, said that not being wanted is one of the worst things that can happed to a human. It’s not so good for dogs either.

Thank God Lindy still loves me.

4. What is the first thing you are going to do when the quarantine is over?

Well, first, I want to go to my Aunt Jeanna and Uncle Ted’s and run as fast as I can, climb some trees, swim, and jump real high. And, as an added bonus for Aunt Jeanna, I am going to chase away all the pesky deer and squirrels. I love doing that and I know she really appreciates it too.

On the way home, I am going to woof to Lindy to take me to the Dairy Queen where they have a special kind of dog food called ice cream.

Then I guess I’ll take a nap. I just want things to go back to normal. I want to go to work, kiss my friends, and NOT wear the muzzle.

5. This was a good question that Tipper asked me, how do you like to start and end your day?

I start and end my day with prayer. Sometimes I stretch pray, sometimes I run and jump pray, sometimes I snuggle pray. It’s all prayer.

Thanks for these great questions Maggie. I had fun being interviewed by you.

Your friend,

Rowan

Now here are the rules of the interview:
  • 1. If you are interested in being interviewed, leave a comment here on my mom's blog saying, 'interview me.'
  • 2. I will respond by posting five questions for you. I get to pick the questions.
  • 3. You will update your blog with a post with your answers to the questions.
  • 4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
  • 5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
If any of you dogs, cats, humans, or others want to be interviewed just contact my guardian. It would be my honor and pleasure to woof some questions over to you.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Saint Laika Pray For Us

Laika, in 1957, became the first animal to be launched into orbit, paving the way for human spaceflight.  She is shown here in her flight harness.
Laika is shown here in her flight harness.

Today the Most Holy and Blessed Order of OCICBW observed the feast day of Saint Laika of Blessed Memory, our patron.

Like many of us Saint Laika was of dubious parentage and clearly not a dog destined for greatness according to the ways of the human world. She never won a dog contest or pulled anyone from a burning building. There were no made-for-TV movies. But Laika's broad, furry shoulders turned out to be high enough to allow a generation of humans to to reach the stars.

Laika teaches us that greatness lurks in unlikely hearts, that you don't have to come from a good family to be a good dog, and that there is no greater love than to give your life for your guardian.

Even though I am not a real saint, I am a dog, I still hope that I can be brave and selfless like Laika.

Hail blessed Laika, bless all us dogs and make us brave like you. WOOF!

Laika was a Russian space dog which became the first recorded living creature from Earth to enter orbit. At one time a stray wandering the streets of Moscow, she was selected from an animal shelter.