It's A Dog's Life

Saturday, October 03, 2009

I know you're all glad to know that I've been for a ride in the car almost every day. It's the best way for me to survey the diocese and make sure that there's lots of playing going on.

I urge you to play without ceasing. There are so many lovely forms that your playing can take that you're sure to find a way that's just right for you. Besides just running and barking, there's digging holes, jumping, and the specialized ministry of wiggling. Remember to be true to your own path, and wiggle once in awhile, and you'll be fine.

I wish you could all be here to rub my belly and give me treats. But, mainly so that we could all play together.

Your friend,
and the Bishop of Playing,


Wednesday, August 26, 2009


As you may know, my guardian and faithful assistant has been gone away from me for awhile. She went to a New city called York which I think is probably a pretty nice place, but not as much fun as the beach.

A'course I was alright without her. I can run this diocese all by myself, after all. But, I am happy that she is back home to pet me and drive me around the diocese in the car. I like the car rides quite a lot.

Today Lindy took me for a ride in the car and we went to The Beach. I was very happy to see a lot of humans there playing and jumping in the water. Also, I want to remind you all of the importance of laughing. It's one of the best things you can do.

So, here are some nice photos of me having my real great day at the beach.

Now get out there and have some fun of your own.


Bishop of Playing

Monday, June 22, 2009

Dear Blog friends, and Members of the Diocese,

Here are a couple of shots of me doing my important duties in the back yard.

I hope that by seeing me have a real good time doing my job, it will inspire you to have fun at your job too.  


Thursday, June 04, 2009

More Great Pictures of Me

As you can see, I've been going places in my car.

In this shot I am sporting my wide-band reflective collar.  Lindy likes me to wear it for safety when we're out and about.  That's one of the good parts of having a guardian, someone to look out for you.

This is a shot of me at the beach.  The water was real clear and the sky was especially high.  It was a good day to be outside, I'll tell you what.

Of course, I did quite a lot of running at the beach.  When I am real happy like that, it makes me think that God is probably pretty happy too.  I like making God happy.

In this one I am running my fastest.
Look, no paws.

I did some exploring too.
Nothing here...

I also made all these birds fly away.  I did it all by myself, just because I could.  I wonder if the birds like it when I chase them?

After all that, I laid down and took my well-deserved rest.

I hope that you had a good time doing whatever it is that you do. Try to play some everyday, and resting on the beach is important too.



From the Dog House of Rowan the Dog, Bishop of Playing

To All Creatures:

Grace and treats to you in the name of me and all the Diocese of Playing.  

We have taken a break from our important ministries of jumping, running, digging, and barking in order to consider for a moment the very bad behavior of the human bishops in The Episcopal Church.

I bark the truth to you.  You know my only desire, besides treats, is to heard you into truth and play.  So, listen carefully and we'll just review a couple points of good behavior:


It is good behavior to have secret committees if you are a secretive type of club like the Klu Klux Klan.  

It is not good behavior, and your guardian will be real disappointed,  if you have a secret committee and one of your stated organizational values is transparency.  The Episcopal Church has always been among the most transparent organizations in the whole human world.  To suddenly have a secret committee is a slap in the face of one of its finest attributes.  It's a chink in the armor of what has made TEC strong;  that is, the ability to scrutinize itself.

It is bad behavior to be on a secret committee.


It is bad behavior for humans to study other humans without asking them first.  I think that it is real disrespectful and mean when the humans treat each other like experiments. Not even goats are that mean.  In fact, in all the animal world it is pretty much unheard of. 

Besides, I think the humans could find a more compelling subject.  I live with a lesbian and, just to be totally honest, it's not all that interesting.  The human's time would be better spent studying molecules of stuff, or trying to figure out what planet those big Humbolt Squid are from.   

It is bad behavior to objectify others.


The purpose of committees is to get people to work together for a common good.  A lot of times that's what happens, too.  Committees are good in that way.  But, sometimes, and this is a big problem among the humans, a committee gets set up just so that people can share blame and not do the right thing.   It is bad behavior to be on one of those committees.

As an example, the human bishops have been studying human sexuality for about twenty or thirty years.  Someone, PLEASE, tell them how to do it already!!!    It seems like these bishops are just avoiding having sex because they don't know how to do it.  And now they're planning to put it off until 2011.   Even sheep don't take that long to figure it out.

And, on a related matter, since the human bishops don't even know how to have sex themselves, they shouldn't try to tell other people how to do it.  The human bishops should stop studying sex and just have a try at it themselves.  Hopefully, if they can resolve their own sexual issues they will relax a little bit and start being smarter and nicer.

It is bad behavior to talk about things you don't know about.


It is good.  Sex is good.

There are different ways of doing sex according to what kind of creature you are.   Ducks, for example.... eewww.  Ducks don't do it like dogs, I'll tell you that.  But, because they are ducks, we accept their ways.  Same thing with worms whose sexual practices I don't even want to think about.  It is important, though, if you are a worm to have sex in the worm way.  Otherwise, it won't be a very good experience.  Same with all the other animals.  Turtles shouldn't try to have sex like horses.  It's not good behavior.  But, if you're a horse then it's OK.  By the same token, lesbians should have sex in the lesbian way.  Straighter people, in the straighter way.  You get the idea.  That's the way it works.  And, when everyone has sex in the way that God made for them then all's right with the world.

It is bad behavior to have sex in a way that is not natural for you.

Most all the members of our diocese know these things and are real good players.  I know that you take your ministries seriously and do your best to make God feel happy.  Of special note, I'd like to point out the fine wiggling ministry that some of you are engaged in.  There's also been an increase in the barking ministry for which I know some have been unjustly sent to their kennels.  But, take heart dear creatures.  All is well in our Guardian's Kingdom.  But for the nuisance of these few human bishops we'd already be in glory.

Return to your playing and pray for the human bishops and the poor humans who continue to suffer unjustly from apostolic laziness and stupidity.  May they soon forget their silly and evil need to oppress and join us in Playing!

Your bishop and friend,

+Rowan the Dog

PS - If you do find yourself in the very bad position of having set up a secret committee for the purpose of studying other people's sex without telling them, and someone nicely asks you for the names of the people on your secret committee, don't respond by being a paternalistic prick.  That is bad behavior.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I had my guardian run me out to the beach last week for some running and exploring.  It was a pretty day and we got a good early start.  We like the beach in the morning.  

Here is a nice picture of me in the car.  You can see that I am wearing my new bandana from The Store for SmartPets.  My Aunt Sadie gave it to me.  She's nice.

After we got to Surfside Lindy stopped to get some breakfast/lunch and she got some water for me.  I would have liked to have some human food too but it didn't happen.   Oh well.

There was a big tree log at the beach and I explored it pretty carefully.  You can see it in this photo.

It's hard to imagine how a big tree like that can get all the way to Surfside.  But, there it is.  I tried digging it out but it was too big.

I surly did enjoy all the wonderful smells on the beach, I'll tell you what.  And, of course, I want to smell my very best for my guardian.  She does so many nice things for me.  The least I can do is show my appreciation by smelling nice.  

In this shot I am getting some dead fish smell on me.  Yummmmm.

You can see lots of other really great shots of me at the beach in the slideshow below.  You can see the big tree log too.  Lindy asked me to stay near that so that she could always find me and I obeyed her.  In fact, not to be bragging or anything, but Lindy said I had perfect obedience all day.  She was real proud of me.  She said so.  Here's the slide show:

And, here is a picture of me on the way home.  I like going by to see these cows and horses.  I am hoping that some day I can get out of the car and do some, um, "ministry action,"
 yeah, that's the ticket, I want to do ministry action with them.  And bark at them.

Then at home I just sat in my chair and tried to look good.

I hope you all get to have some fun times wherever you are.  Even if you can't go to the beach, try to do something that makes God happy.  I'm pretty sure she likes laughing and wiggling.



Thursday, April 16, 2009

That man looks real nice, dosen't he? His name is George. Look how gently he is giving pets. A real soft touch, I'll bet.

And that little puppy is our beautiful Scout. It's hard to believe that Scout was that little once, isn't it? But, things change.

Scout's life changed this week. Her friend George had his last day. That means that he is gone from Earth. The Last Day, I think, is harder on those of us left behind than on the ones who go.

Please say some prayers for Scout and her family so that maybe they won't feel so sad, and that they will have hope in the time when we are all up in Heaven together. You can pray to either Jesus or Mary, or even one of the brighter saints... just someone who will know what Scout and her family need will help them.

Pray especially for the humans. They are so fragile, you know. And they need all the love that God and Dog can muster.

And, while you're down on your nobby human knees, pray for one another. Give thanks for the life that we all share on this Earth, for our connection to one another and to God, and pray that we can all live and play gently like George.



Wednesday, April 15, 2009

As you can probably tell from the real great photograph on the left, I am wearing my pretty blue bandanna today. I've had it for a long time and it is pretty soft. Much softer than my newer ones. I like it quite a lot.

In the photos today you will see me near my wood pile. Sometimes the humans come and take some of my wood and burn it. That is a real big help to me since I am trying to get to all the little creatures that live underneath the wood. I know for a fact that there are lizards under there. Maybe other stuff too.

Here is a picture showing how I look when I am on watch for a critter. I am paying real close attention to any sounds or smells. Critters give clues, you know. I have to be very attentive. But, as you can see, I am still wearing my bandanna.

I try to be real faithful in my duties because I know it is an example to my guardian of how to be on the lookout for God. Keep aware, be ready. Stay focused on critters, er, I mean love. And get your ears up. Be sensitive to the slightest movement. And, also, dress as well as you possibly can.

I hope that each one of you has a good and happy day today, and that you are able to concentrate real hard on what is most important to you. Because, if you look real hard, you will find what you are looking for.

And, don't forget to play.